My weekly adventures in (not) writing

Sometimes writing is a wild goose chase. Sometimes listening to your gut can help you avoid the wild goose chase.

There was a want ad for magazine writers in the newspaper. I'd never heard of the magazine, but I checked out the website. There were no articles on their website. There were article titles, the first four lines of the articles, and photos. Oh, and there was a read more link, but that link just led to a Buy this Magazine subscription page. Not that there's anything wrong with this. The problem is that there were no articles or bylines on their websites. How can a prospective costumer or writer know what they're getting without one sample article, or at least a name? There was a note from the editor, but the editor's name wasn't listed either.

I called the number listed in the newspaper to see if they were looking for staff writers or freelance writers. Freelance writers. They wanted a photo and a resume. No problem. I called again to make sure I had the editor's name. The number in the newspaper was a cell phone number. Their other local office number was also a cell phone number. Nothing against cell phone numbers, but it's nice for a business to have a permanent number. My sister warned me when I told her which magazine it was, but I still wanted to give it a shot.

I made sure my resume was up to dated, polished a cover letter, uploaded my photo, and fired off an email. I expected to wait a few days. Maybe even weeks. Imagine my surprise when a return email appeared in my in-box within 30 minutes. It was a "Dear Applicant" letter. I'd rather someone took two seconds to address me since I took the time to learn their name. Whatever. The email got even more impersonal. They wanted 9 tourism topics of interest to readers. Best wishes. Then they signed off with the magazine website, and a notation that the email had been sent from a BlackBerry. No actual name of the person responding, no salutation directed at me, nothing. No mention of pay, no word count, no deadline, no specifics.

I still have no idea if a human responded to me. I should have known this was weird the moment I saw a photo of a government tourism official on their website with a caption of them vaguely praising the magazine. Nothing inspires less confidence than the Jamaican government praising anything. I should have drawn the line at the cell phone numbers. One of which went straight to voice mail when I called again. I should have drawn the line at the cell phone operator taking a thousand years to tell me her editor's name while cellphone feedback destroyed my ears. I don't think she knew what the heck I was talking about at first.

The wild goose chase had to end somewhere. Ordinarily I don't let setbacks get in the way. But when it's one bizarre, unprofessional thing after another I listen to my gut and let it go.



Photos courtesy SXC